Doesn't seem the same these days.

Restless nights have been the norm since the beginning of last week. My mind has been racing on and on about a million things. It's hard to stay focused on anything. I am quite excited about therapy tomorrow. My therapist has been out of town. I don't know how she'll help, but it will be nice just to talk about everything. I'm also very glad that we have this week off. It was great timing, this holiday break.

Although, I'm not really much into the holidays. I guess, growing up with my family, holidays were never that great. When we would get everyone together for the holidays, everyone was always fighting. So, eventually we stopped getting together. When it was just me and my mom, we would just order a pizza and watch the parade. That was about as exciting as it got with my family. For the past couple of years I've been going to friends houses. Spending time with my real family. This year, I'm going to Ian's house for Thanksgiving. But I will be spending Christmas with Kristin's family.

As far as all this stress, I think it's anxiety. I'm pretty sure I just have anxiety issues. Thanks, mom.

I'm not really sure why I'm blogging. But, I am. a slow Sunday with nothing to do. I've been feeling really distant from everyone. Except for Jimmy and Kristin. I've been feeling a lot closer to them. I'm so thankful to have them in my life.

Overwhelmed.

It’s just another one of those days, I guess.
Everyone is sleeping.
And my anxiety is keeping me up.
I don’t know what to do.

I wish you were here.
I would call, but you’re sick.
And you need your rest.
So I won’t.

It’s just always unfortunate timing.
I do my best, and try everything I can to be there for you.
When you are sick, or upset, or overwhelmed, or angry.
Anything.
I try to be there for you.

I just always get sick,
Or upset,
Or overwhelmed,
Or angry
At all the wrong times.

I’m not placing blame.
This isn’t your fault.
I’m just upset.
And I wish you were here.

I don’t want to be clingy
Or needy.
I’m just having a hard time with everything, lately.

But I’m my own person.
So I’ll figure it out on my own.


I love you; I hope you get better soon.
Let me know if there is anything I can do for you.